Back home, I rang the nearest hotel to ask if the owner of the bank card was staying there. No, said the manager, but our local policeman had called last night asking the same question. The gentleman had been drinking rather a lot and needed the policeman's guidance to find the way to where he was staying.
I rang the police on 101 for a non-emergency matter. They tracked down our local policeman who came and collected the bank card and drove off to give it to its owner who was due to leave Northumberland today to return home.
Where else could something like this have been sorted out by 9.15 in the morning?
I lost my bank card at 6.35 this evening when it was swallowed by the cash machine at my local Co-op (no, I hadn't been drinking - or only Communion wine!). The Co-op gave me an emergency phone number and it was all sorted out by 6.55 p.m. (old card cancelled by the bank, new one ordered). Not as colourful an episode as yours and lacking Northumbrian rural charm but the anonymous man at the call centre seemed very efficient and reassuring. We'll see what happens!
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